my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
You have to summon your inner elephant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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