Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
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i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
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Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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