my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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