A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
You're a waste of cheezeits
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Randomize
