Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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