told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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