You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Small penises have feelings too.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
