at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
