I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
