I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
