Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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