hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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