just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
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DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
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Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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