this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
