This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
