There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
operation harelip BJ is a go
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Randomize
