Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize