idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
