You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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