I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
