Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
The Olympian is in my bed
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Randomize
