yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize