"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Randomize
