don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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