You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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