Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
