I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize