in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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