That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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