Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.

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(215): Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT. http://tfl.nu/2ngi

Replies (14) Good night (2094) Bad night (691)
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(859): View more from Kentucky

Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.

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(859): Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota. http://tfl.nu/azvw

Replies (14) Good night (2879) Bad night (811)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.

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(978): Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially. http://tfl.nu/gw0l

Replies (24) Good night (9376) Bad night (883)
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(630): View more from Illinois

It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table

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(630): It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table http://tfl.nu/i2oz

Replies (25) Good night (1555) Bad night (4273)
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(314): View more from Missouri

Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one

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(314): Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one http://tfl.nu/zke4

Replies (3) Good night (1118) Bad night (3149)
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(228): View more from Mississippi

I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.

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(228): I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me. http://tfl.nu/ndpv

Replies (6) Good night (2492) Bad night (978)
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(541): View more from Oregon

ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack

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(541): ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack http://tfl.nu/jnxf

Replies (7) Good night (1001) Bad night (1532)
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(917): View more from New York City

The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...

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(917): The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline... http://tfl.nu/p4q2

Replies (1) Good night (2348) Bad night (1062)
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(845): View more from New York

Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!

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(845): Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE! http://tfl.nu/hm6x

Replies (7) Good night (1240) Bad night (976)
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(631): View more from New York

I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.

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(631): I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice. http://tfl.nu/lrh1

Replies (6) Good night (1162) Bad night (667)
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.

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(717): I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that. http://tfl.nu/2l8e

Replies (5) Good night (712) Bad night (650)
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(312): View more from Illinois

I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.

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(312): I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again. http://tfl.nu/hmft

Replies (0) Good night (680) Bad night (364)
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(248): View more from Michigan

How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time

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(248): How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time http://tfl.nu/txfn

Replies (7) Good night (678) Bad night (460)
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(831): View more from California

So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great

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(831): So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great http://tfl.nu/lton

Replies (1) Good night (386) Bad night (820)
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(956): View more from Texas

There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.

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(956): There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried. http://tfl.nu/mygr

Replies (0) Good night (524) Bad night (376)

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