all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize