we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
