these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
