i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
