Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
So gin and wine won't be happening again
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
