You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
