I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Even the bartender felt bad for me
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
