i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
