do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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