Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
As shirtless as possible
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
