So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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