Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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