Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
