haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Randomize
