So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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