Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Everything about him screamed your future.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
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