I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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