I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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