I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
