I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
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