I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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